(courtesy Penguin Books Australia)
How on earth do you respond with any sense of sanity or certainty when everything you have ever depended on suddenly crumbles to dust in one fateful instant?
That’s the huge question that confronts Marco di Mario one particularly scary day when, fresh from finishing first in the state (in this case, Victoria, Australia) and with an eye firmly fixed on the 15 years of tertiary study it will take to become a surgeon, something he’s wanted since he was six, he has not one but two panic attacks.
For the uber-confident protagonist of Tobias Madden’s third novel, Wrong Answers Only, its cataclysmically alarming because the bright, young gay man has always, ALWAYS known who he was and what he wanted with nary a tremor of doubt or shudder of prevarication.
His course has long been set and his mind firmly and undeniably made up and the idea that he might be frightened of anything is not only anathema but completely unthinkable – he is, after all, capable of everything so why would he suddenly be falling to existentially messy pieces?
He has no idea, and in denial about the fact that he’s having panic attacks at all (it’s a “blip” and nothing more, thank you), he rebuffs his mother’s initiative to book into therapy, rejects out of hand his parents’ decision to delay his tertiary study for a year while he works at his dad and uncle’s auto business and determines he’ll forge ahead regardless of his momentary lapse in overweening confidence.
I’ve done everything I was supposed to, at every step of the way.
I said those exact words to my whole family in Nonna’s front lounge, seconds after Mum and dad told me I had to stay in Ballarat. And now here I am, a few reckless decisions under my belt, standing with my soulmate in the middle of Pompeii, a place I’ve dreamed of visiting since I was a little kid.
‘You’ve always picked the right answers,’ CeCe finishes, her trademark twinkle returning to her brown eyes. ‘I think it’s time for you to get a few things wrong.’
But then his mother calls the university anyway and suddenly he has nothing but time to figure out what the hell is going on with him? (Nothing, naturally, but let’s humour the parentals, shall we?)
The solution says his beloved and feisty Nonna (grandmother) Sofia – Macro is from solidly, passionately Italian stock and his grandmother is the standard bearer of their staunchly close family – is to go and stay for a few months on the Mediterranean cruise ship his estranged uncle Renzo is working on as a staff captain (one rank below the captain).
It’s a bold move, especially since Renzo hasn’t had contact with the family for 30 years and no one will discuss why that is, and one that Marco’s dad Andrea, Renzo’s younger brother, is none too pleased about; but then when Sofia makes up her mind, it’s a brave person who will stand in her way.
So, with fear and trepidation since going to somewhere he doesn’t know to do things he has planned to within an inch of their life is not how the would-be surgeon operates, Marco sets off on a trip that he and everyone hopes will give him some answers about the panic-not-panic-attack and maybe clue him into why his family seems to suddenly have more secrets than a secret spy network.
Macros isn’t sure how to approach this most known of unknown life landscapes, but as he settles into life onboard the ship and meets the ship’s hot dancer Hunter, he decides to act on his bestie CeCe’s non-negotiable “suggestion” – they have been friends since childhood and she has opinions that will be not discounted or dismissed – to chuck all that risk avoidance overboard and get a few things wrong.
WRONG?! Yes, wrong; it goes against everything Marco’s ever done but he decides to give it a shot and see what happens.
Wrong Answers Only is all about what happens when one young queer man, who thinks he has all the answers, suddenly he does not, and how he reacts to a world effectively turned upside down.
It’s a bright and entertaining read, full of sparklingly rich dialogue – if there’s one thing Madden does well and honestly it’s just about everything in this top shelf YA novel, it’s craft dialogue that feels real, honest and very life-like – fun characters who get lots wrong and make a real mess of things (so very human which is refreshing) and a storyline that really digs down into some serious exploration of mental health issues.
Especially welcome is the fact that Marco doesn’t suddenly get better or become convinced that what everyone is saying about the panic attacks is right; it mostly is, of course, but the fact that Mario fights the truth for so long feel very authentic or real since who of us, when confront with a life truth diametrically opposed to anything we believe and hold dear, and makes him and his struggle feel liberatingly accessible.
I’m about to reply when she adds, her face suddenly like stone, ‘But let me be clear. If you ever — and I mean ever — song Troye Sivan without me again, I will kill you and wear your skin as a fancy jacket.’
I bite back a smile. ‘That’s incredibly morbid, Celine, but … duly noted.’
We both laugh, and an inexplicable lightness fills the room.
‘I love you, Ce.’
She grins, eyes sparkling, and everything is right again.
It’s this wonderful mix of escapism and truth that makes Wrong Answers Only such a pleasure to read and why it’s likely going to resonate with its key target demo.
It is honest about the fact that life doesn’t always square with how we see it or expect it to play out, and that gives it an emotional weight which fits neatly alongside its more fun and buoyant elements.
Madden keeps that mix just so between the light and fun and the suitably serious all the way through, the humour acting as an effervescent counterweight to the novel’s more sober and ruminative moments and lending Wrong Answers Only the kind of emotional heft that will broaden and increase its appeal, not only on a first read but over time.
It’s one of those stories that knows life isn’t clear cut, not happy nor sad all the time, and it steers its way beautifully through some very dark and troubling moments to get Marco to a place where life looks nothing it once did and which is all the better for it.
Full from the bow to the stern with engaging, thoughtful and funny characters, dialogue that resonates with real humour and emotional truth and a storyline that is equal parts escapist fun and seriously introspective, Wrong Answers Only is a moving delight that’s heartfelt and comedically light and that leaves a lasting impression and a reminder that stopping and checking if we really are alright might just be the best thing you ever do for yourself.